| Wow. It's been years since I've written in this thing...
And no one is gonna read this, but whatever. I don't care. I just need to express
myself, and not through MySpace for once. I guess you can call this my diary. Haha.
Well, Things have changed drastically. You don't even have the slightest idea...but just note-I am a different and better person for my own well being.
First of all, eighth grade year in middle school was a disgrace. I was in that "depression//emo" stage. Haha. Come on, you guys know what I'm talking about. Need I explain more? I think not. After that phase, I kind of brought it into the beginning of my Freshman year again. But then I stopped and thought for a second. What is the point of this lifestyle? Shrouded in all black; being mopey and sad all the time; listening to Death Metal; confining yourself to a room? Why the point is...ABSOLUTELY NOTHING. It did me no good. It took me absolutely nowhere in life. Nothing significant ever occurred. Seriously, what was the point of being like that? I finally came to realize this in a short period of time and slowly but surely changed everything. I mean everything. Not only my physical appearance, but mentally, I knew better. And because of that, the rest of Freshman year was wicked awesome. I made new, positive, up-building friends. I stepped up to my game. I seeked out for adventures. I lived life everyday to its full potential. I did things that I never thought I'd do. Right and wrong. Good and bad. Too many countless mistakes were made, and tears were shed, both out of joy and frustration. But I kept persisting, and nothing could get in my way. Freshman year really changed me, it did. I finally realized and found my true self. Who I really am. I am ALINA. No more pretending to fit in. No more being fake to impress people. No more following the wrong crowd's footsteps. No more kidding myself.
Sure, I'm still a young kid at only 15. And sure, it's only been a couple years since I was in the eighth grade. But I have come to think
before I speak and I now evaluate my actions before doing them, and
actually take time to measure out the consequences. It's that simple.
All you have to do is just think. Yeah, I'm still learning, still getting there. There will be some falling points along the way, but I'll just have to pick myself up. There's no time to dwell in the past anymore. I have to look forward and just keep moving on. And that's what I've keeping up with now to this very day. It's the third//fourth week of Sophomore year and nothing has gotten in my way. I'm very content with where I am in life and I'm not taking it for granted. Not this time. :]
-Oh, and ignore my gay ass Xanga name, please. It was 2005... >.<
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